Don’t let his disrespect poison your marriage.
Is his disrespectful and rude behavior making you feel unloved and neglected? If he’s dismissing your feelings, saying unkind things to you, or ignoring your needs, it’s time to take action before things go from bad to worse.
Here are 13 marriage-saving tips to help you deal with your husband’s disrespect.
1. Be the change you want to see.
First things first, take a moment to reflect on your own actions. Do you find yourself dishing it back when he lashes out? Maybe brushing off his feelings or disregarding his opinions? If so, you might both be caught in a never-ending cycle of miscommunication.
Regardless of who’s at fault, setting a good example by respecting him is key. Remember, you don’t have to see eye to eye, but maintaining civility and speaking the way you’d like to be spoken to can make all the difference.
2. Check your own insecure behaviors.
Jealousy and neediness may stem from a fear of losing your partner. This behavior could trigger your husband’s disrespect.
Relying on your husband to constantly reassure you can create a wedge between you. He may resort to belittling your concerns to let you know that not every issue is his responsibility.
Managing your daily emotional needs on top of his own might be too overwhelming, so try to find a balance and address these insecurities together.
3. Put it in writing.
Maybe he’s not hearing you out and understanding the impact of your words. When you express hurt feelings verbally, he may jump to defensiveness rather than considering your perspective.
Writing a note could help your words sink in. Reading your thoughts in writing removes him from a face-to-face confrontation and provides clear, physical evidence of how his disrespect is impacting you.
4. Honestly examine his criticisms of you.
It’s possible that he has valid points about certain behaviors, even if his delivery is less than tactful. This isn’t about blaming yourself, but recognizing that no one in a marriage is entirely perfect or imperfect.
If he’s voicing why he struggles to respect you, use that as an opportunity for self-improvement and remove his excuses for disrespect. Show that you’re open to constructive feedback, and set an example of mutual respect.
5. Try to reestablish closeness and connection.
During peaceful moments, engage him in conversations that foster connection. Express genuine interest in his thoughts and emotions, encouraging him to open up and share his inner world.
By building emotional intimacy and trust, you create a powerful counterbalance to disrespectful behavior. Trust can be the key to breaking down the walls of disrespect.
6. Stay calm when sharing your pain around his disrespect.
Before reacting, take a moment to calm yourself. Try counting to ten or take a few deep breaths to prevent an angry response. Then, assertively communicate your boundaries by saying something like, “I don’t appreciate the way you’re talking to me” or “Please stop putting me down.”
Using this approach signals to your husband that he’s crossed a line. Often, people don’t realize the impact their words have until it’s pointed out.
7. Uphold your boundaries and demand respect.
