“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck where you do not belong.” ~N. R. Narayana Murthy
Anyone who had a Stretch Armstrong as a kid remembers that moment when you and a friend would test the limits of what good ol’ Armstrong could handle. You’d each grab an arm and slowly walk backward, waiting for that pivotal moment when either your strength would give out or Armstrong’s limbs would tear apart like a medieval torture device.
If you reached your strength limit, an older sibling would eagerly join in—nothing brought them more joy than watching your excitement dissolve into tears as Armstrong’s newly limbless body crossed the point of no return.
Why do we get stuck? We fail to define stuckness for what it is.
Feeling stuck does not mean your feet are superglued to the floor.
Being stuck is an active state that pulls you in opposite directions—just like Armstrong. One part says, “Don’t give up,” while another says, “This isn’t working.” No wonder it’s impossible to move forward. But what if, just for a moment, you didn’t have to choose?
What if you could just be with this stuckness without needing to solve it right now?
Maybe even acknowledging it, like, “I’m stuck, and it makes total sense considering all the shit going on in my life.”
I’m currently dealing with existential angst about my career. While there are so many advantages to working for yourself—no one telling you where to be or what to do and having freedom over your time—the downside is flipping that world upside down: with no one checking in, it’s painfully isolating. There’s no one to lean into or pick up the slack on hard days, and there’s no sense that you’re working toward a common goal. You own everything.
Warren Buffett’s right-hand man, Charlie Munger, famously stated, “Life is all about making wise choices and dealing with trade-offs. In business and elsewhere, I’ve yet to see a good example of something that’s totally free—there’s always a catch, always a cost.”
Being happy does not come from avoiding trade-offs but from being clear-eyed about which ones you’re willing to accept.
This is where I’m stuck. I’m not sure those trade-offs are worth it anymore. After eight-plus years of working solo, I’m hearing the siren call of a life I long for, being a part of a cause bigger than myself.
But how do you distinguish between times when you should sit with uncertainty and times when you need to take decisive action and stop overthinking?
Powerful question, eh?
There’s a real balance between giving something space and taking action; it can be hard to know what is needed.
This is the clarity that awareness can give us.
It’s an opportunity to notice the energy behind your desire to act.
Does action feel like it’s coming from urgency, fear, or the need to escape discomfort?
That’s a damn good sign action is not the answer.
Or do you have a sense of clarity, even if it’s not total certainty?
If the action feels like relief rather than running, that might be a sign it’s time to move.
When you think about taking action right now, does it feel like relief and alignment? Or does it feel more like panic and pressure?
I don’t have clarity. I don’t know what I want. I’m flooded with emotions.
My energy is pulsing with urgency, fear, and a need to escape the discomfort.
What does that tell me? I’m trying to make a decision from a place that’s not grounded.
That doesn’t mean I won’t take action—it just means my system needs more space, so I’m not making decisions from a place of fear.
In a culture that sees action as the only solution, it’s easy to be swept away by thinking movement is how we solve stuckness, but this comes back to failing to see it for what it is: You’re being pulled in opposite directions.
The faster you race toward answers, the more answers race away.
I’m no further ahead than you on this adventure. Life is unfolding for both of us, one day at a time.
Know that I see you.
Instead of taking action, would it feel supportive to take a small step toward grounding?
Maybe a deep breath, placing a hand on your heart, or even reminding yourself, “I don’t have to figure this all out right now.”
Would it feel okay to just acknowledge that for a moment? Letting all parts of you know, “I see the pain, I see the urgency, and I’m not ignoring you. I just want to move from a place of clarity, not fear.”
You don’t have to rush—just allow yourself to settle before deciding what’s next.
How does that feel?
Finding that starting point—where you feel grounded instead of just reacting—is everything.
About Chris Wilson
Chris is a dad, a coach, and someone who’s rebuilt life from scratch. Through depression, job loss, and that silent burnout nobody talks about. Simplify Sundays, a community of a thousand-people strong, emerged from those dark days. Want to join? Start with the FREE weekly check-in. It takes less than three minutes. It’s your chance to step back, breathe deep, and reconnect with what lights up your soul.
