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“Rituals are the formulas by which harmony is restored.” ~Terry Tempest Williams
Life doesn’t come with a manual.
One day, you might find a relationship you believed would endure. The next, a career path suddenly fades away. Health issues, financial troubles, aging parents, or a shocking diagnosis can emerge. And let’s not forget challenges on a global scale.
If you’re fortunate, you haven’t faced all these experiences yet. But the truth is: we all navigate uncertainty.
The in-between space—where we transition from what was to what will be—is often where life truly unfolds. Yet discussions about managing this space are rare. We seek to optimize or escape, hustle or numb—anything but confront the discomfort of the unknown.
Here’s a surprising revelation: embracing uncertainty isn’t about gaining control. It’s about learning to flow with life’s challenges instead of being overwhelmed.
This is where the understated power of ritual comes into play.
Not necessarily the grand ceremonies involving incense and chants—though those have their place. I’m referring to small, intentional actions that create daily rhythms, helping you feel centered even amidst instability.
Ritual as Sanctuary
When my father passed away unexpectedly, I experienced how rituals can provide solace when everything feels chaotic. In the turmoil of grief, the mourning practices within our community—the wakes, shared meals, and familiar hymns—sustained us.
These weren’t grand solutions. They didn’t erase the pain but offered a framework to contain it. That structure became our anchor.
That’s the essence of ritual.
Even in my daily life, rituals ground me when the world feels unstable.
Sometimes it’s lighting candles at dinnertime, and other times it’s taking a brief “noticing walk”—a few moments dedicated to observing nature around me. These practices may seem simple, but they weave meaning into my day and help me reconnect with my identity.
Why Ritual Works When Life Becomes Chaotic
Rituals have been integral to every culture for a reason. Some anthropologists consider ritual foundational to civilization. They help us mark time, establish order, and find deeper meaning—even when the future feels uncertain.
Unlike habits focused on efficiency or routines that can become mindless, rituals demand our presence. They carry emotional depth. And while they need not be complex, they require intention and respect.
Your morning dog walk? It can transform into a ritual if you approach it as a time to breathe, observe the sky, and root yourself in the present. Lighting a candle before bed, saying a blessing before meals, or jotting down a few lines in a journal each night—
These aren’t just “life hacks.” They are affirmations that even amid chaos, you still have a choice in how you engage with your life. And that choice—however slight—holds power.
Ritual Is About Presence, Not Perfection
A common misconception is that rituals must be rigid. In reality, rituals can—and should—evolve. They aren’t meant to control our experiences but rather to help us confront them with steadiness. They can also be enjoyable!
The meaning in rituals emerges not just from repetition but from their roots. That’s why I encourage connecting ritual practices to a personal “North Star”—your core values or vision of the person you aspire to be. When the external world feels chaotic, this inner compass becomes vital. Even the simplest ritual, aligned with your deepest values, can become a powerful act of coherence.
I often say, “You don’t need more time. You need more intention.” Just a few moments of mindful action, grounded in your values, can transform your entire day.
This is especially true when the day is challenging.
The understated gift of ritual is that it won’t erase uncertainty but will remind you of who you’re meant to be amidst it.
The Neuroscience of Ritual
There’s also a significant physiological aspect to ritual. When we engage in intentional, values-driven actions—especially those rich in structure and sensory elements—we begin to rewire our brains.
This phenomenon, known as neuroplasticity, shows us that repeated actions infused with emotional significance strengthen neural pathways and foster resilience. Rituals serve as tangible tools for transformation.
Even the structure of rituals has benefits. Just a few minutes of concentrated, positive experience each day can modify our feelings and behaviors.
Getting Started
If life seems unpredictable right now (and even if it doesn’t), consider this:
Select one part of your day to reclaim—a moment that already exists. Perhaps it’s the minute before your morning coffee, the transition between work and dinner, or a few breaths before sleep.
Add a layer of intention to it. A breath. A word. A gesture. A prayer. A pause.
Then take it a step further: connect that moment to your core values.
Ask yourself: What intention do I want to bring into this part of my day? Perhaps it’s compassion, strength, or simply a commitment to being present.
Let that intention guide your ritual. You could write it down or speak it aloud. When your ritual reflects your core values, it transcends mere habit—it becomes a practice of alignment.
Need assistance pinpointing those values? Ask:
- How do I wish to present myself in this moment?
- What would my highest self do here?
- What truly matters to me when distractions fade away?
Repeat your ritual daily. Not with rigidity, but with reliability.
Then observe what changes.
You may still find yourself in uncertainty, but you won’t feel unanchored. You’ll have created a sacred interlude. And within that space, you might uncover the steadiness you didn’t know you possessed.
Ritual as Resistance—and Renewal
In a culture that prioritizes productivity over presence, dedicating time to ritualize your day can seem revolutionary. Yet it’s profoundly restorative. Ritual reminds us that we are not machines; we are humans, yearning for connection, coherence, and care.
Whether you’re lighting a candle, taking a breath, or practicing in solitude or community—it matters. Not because it will resolve every issue but because it empowers you to confront those issues with clarity and compassion.
In uncertain times, ritual may not provide a detailed map.
But it will guide you to your true north.
About Kris Farren Moss
Kris Farren Moss is a Stanford-educated author and coach who assists individuals in crafting meaningful rituals for connection and purpose. Her book, Your Guide to Ritual Design, combines personal reflection with practical insights, influenced by her Irish Catholic roots and profound curiosity about how humans create meaning.
